About Me

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I'm an Army wife and aspiring author, published by Evernight Publishing. I primarily write M/M, but I'm starting to branch out. I'm not very good at technology, but I'm hoping this blog gives me the opportunity to communicate with other authors and readers. My life is kept interesting by my soldier, Ringo the chihuahua, and all the amazing people that I consider friends. I also work entirely too much as a coach at a local gym, a caregiver at a church nursery, and a freelance baker.

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Sunday, December 23, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 23

It is the penultimate day of the Lego Advent calendar. I love that word, don't you?

Day Twenty-Three: Presents!

Lego presents. Meh, I guess that's decent. Presents are a staple of Christmas. A practical Lego item.

Looks like someone's being wooed.

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 22

OK, so maybe I overreacted yesterday. I mean, cancelling Christmas is a bit much. Maybe today will be better.

Day Twenty-Two: Reasonably Nice Sled

OK, so it's a sled. It attaches to the ATV. That's fun, right? 

With only a few days left, I am confident that the next two items will amaze. Surely the Lego calendar people would not disappoint children (and goofy authors) so close to Christmas. I am cautiously optimistic.

Friday, December 21, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 21

Well, folks. Here we are at the end of the world. Just kidding, but I can only imagine what awesomely hilarious and topical item is in today's calendar.

Day Twenty-One: Fucking Traffic Cones

It was perfect. It could have been perfect.

Instead of some sort of Mayan Lego man or apocalyptic Lego monster I got traffic cones.

Fuck it. Christmas is cancelled.

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 20

Today, I had the strangest thing happen to me. I thought I'd left my phone at home. I seriously emptied my purse when I got to work and it wasn't in there. Well a few hours into the slowest shift in history, I go into my purse for some mints and there it is. Madness!

Day Twenty: Nothing Says Christmas Like Snow Shovels

I am unimpressed. Maybe it's because I've never had much snow in my life, but a wheelbarrow and shovel doesn't seem very festive. It's 5 days until Christmas. I want my Lego calendar spitting out elves riding reindeer giving out presents to British orphans who will then gallivant about the village with a terminally melty snowman until Santa arrives with baby Jesus and flamethrower. After all, 'tis the season.


Well, at least those two are having fun. So not all is lost.

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 19

I got peed on at work* this evening, so no matter what is in the calendar, it's awesome to me

Day Nineteen: Ned the Scruffy Fireman

Another Lego citizen. He's got a cup of hot cocoa and he's ready to party.

He's putting the moves on Felicia. He thinks she is both figuratively and literally HAWT.

*By that I mean the job with the church babies, not Curves.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 18

Have you ever had one thing change and it throws off your entire week? Normally, Monday is the only day I don't have to work at either of my jobs, but this week I had to work at Curves so I spent half of today confused thinking it was Friday.

To make up for that, I opened the Lego calendar I little earlier than usual to give myself a little bit of joy before I had to run off to work.

Day Eighteen: K-9
It started off as just a simple dog and fire hydrant for him to pee on. Well, I went through my mish-mash of extra Lego pieces and was able to come up with...


My little Lego universe is coming together quite nicely now.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 17

Christmas Eve is one week away. This also means that we only have one week left of playing with Legos unless somebody invents and then gives me a Just Because January Lego Calendar.

Day Seventeen: Snowball Launcher of DOOOOOOM

First, I was confused. Then I was elated. You'll see the little warning in the corner that warns me not to hit people in the head. I laughed and did it anyway.

So yes, this Snowball Launcher totally works. Also, my cat hates me now.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 16

I finally got the Christmas shopping done! For my side of the family, at least. I'm feeling all adult now, actually being done with something before the last minute. Gives me more time to play with Legos!

Day Sixteen: Cindy the Lego Girl-Child
Cindy came with snowballs as well. Poorly designed ones that none of the Lego citizens can grasp, but again, I digress. But I don't think snowball fighting is what's on these kids' minds. It's young love!
Scruffy got that bitch some hot chocolate. Bitches love hot chocolate.

Maybe it's premature sadness, but I can feel with each passing day that this is coming to an end. Why doesn't every month have one of these? I mean, I know it's a religious thing blah blah Jesus blah. But that's not what this one is about. This one is about pure plastic bricky joy. I want Lego prizes for every day of the year. My life is gonna suck when this is over!

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 15

Can you believe how quickly this month has gone by? It seems like just yesterday that I was starting this thing and now there are only ten days until Christmas!

Day Fifteen: Storage and Bionic Woman
At first I thought storage was a dumb day's worth of items, but I do love that everything is so nice and organized now. If you recall, Felicia was involved in a head fire incident. That accident turned out to be the most bad ass thing that has ever happened. We have rebuilt her. 
Only time will tell if she will use this for good or evil.

Holiday Hop Winner!

The blog hop was awesome as always! I had so many entries on my blog this time around!

Using a random number generator, I picked the winner. That lucky person is...


Thanks for all who entered!

Friday, December 14, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 14

Day Fourteen: Fire Fire Fire!!
Finally, a fire for Clyde and Felicia to fight! This is their moment to shine. With the help of his "special friend", Clyde sprung into action. Felicia sprung as well, but  since she can't wear a helmet...
Her head caught on fire. Always wear a helmet, boys and girls.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 13

Life is still hectic between my poor puppy and the blog hop and death by PowerPoint at Curves training. So I didn't have time to have expectations for today.

Day Thirteen: Desk Area of Ordinariness
My reaction to this is a resounding, "Meh." It's a solid day's worth of Lego objects. It's no ATV, but at least it's not stairs.
Scruffy the Helmeted Hooligan is pretending to work at the computer. If you're wondering why he's standing in the chair, it's because Lego children are of the devil and don't bend at the waist. It's creepy.

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 12

Oh, what a day. I work at Curves and we're going through some big changes there. It's cool and exciting and all, but 3 days of training means I have to wake up in the early. And I don't like the early. Plus, one of my co-workers gave me a cold (thank you, jerk).

Today was also an adventure because my puppy had surgery yesterday. When my husband went to pick him up, they tried to charge him over $100 more than they said on the estimate. So I had to take care of that. And by that I mean, verbally bitch slap. Now little Ringo is missing his balls and part of his liver (he had it biopsied because of some abnormal test results). He's loopy on puppy meds and wearing the Cone of Shame.

Anyway, on with things!

Day Twelve: Felicia Fancybottom
I didn't have high expectations. I don't think yesterday's item can be topped.Yesterday freaking rocked.

Overall, Felicia is pretty cool. Although she doesn't have Lego boobies, she does have make up and hair that makes it impossible for her to wear a helmet. So I guess she's just SOL if debris strikes her in the head.

Here she is posing seductively with a radio.
Werk it, girl...

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 11

Here for the hop? Clicky

Today's item is just...epic. If it keeps up at this pace, I might just melt into a puddle of pure joy before I even make it to Christmas.

Day Eleven: A Friggin' ATV

When I first saw this, I thought it was a snow mobile. Which is cool. Then I had the sudden realization that the wheels from yesterday can snap on to this bitch. And it actually rolls! My phone (which I use to take these pictures) is a useless piece of crap, so I doubt video quality would be any good. Rest assured, it's possibly the most amazing thing ever.

Pictured above: What sheer awesomeness looks like.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 10

If you're here for Evernight's Holiday Blog Hop, click here to see that post and enter to win!

Anyway, when we left off Clyde, Pooch, and Scruffy were just chillin'. Today's item makes a lot of sense of things in more ways than one.

Day Ten: Dolly and Tires of Clarity
Tires! Pooch isn't a plumber! He's a mechanic. Everything makes sense now! These Lego tires are pretty cool. They actually have a rubbery texture. Speaking of rubbers...
Well, looks like I'm the only one hoping for lady Lego boobs now.

Evernight Holiday Blog Hop

Welcome to the Evernight Holiday Blog Hop!
We love the holidays, we love making our readers happy and we love giving away swag. What better way to do that than to hold a blog hop?
Here's how it works... the more blogs you hop to (shown below) the more chance you have of winning prizes. Each site on the hop is offering a prize and Evernight is offering an iPad 2 as the grand prize! To be in with a chance of winning the site prize simply follow the blog you're visiting and leave a comment which includes your email address. Each entry on each blog is then counted towards the grand prize draw. The more entries you have, the better your chance of winning that iPad 2! You also get extra points for liking the Evernight Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/#!/evernightpublishing. Just make sure you let us know in the comments that you've done so.
Happy hopping!

That's right. The amazing folks at Evernight are at it again with another blog hop. They're rock stars and they've really outdone themselves this time. An iPad would definitely be an awesome holiday gift.

Of course, I have a little holiday treat of my own. I'll be giving away the winner's choice of either of my two novellas. You could keep warm with some sexy soldier loving in Hero or read about Darcy's misadventures in Snow White and the Hitman.

All you have to do to be entered to win my prize and to receive an entry to win the grand prize of an iPad 2, is follow my blog, leave me a comment (including your e-mail address).

Remember to keep hopping! Good luck!

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 9

I'm feeling extra epic today. Maybe it was the Dos Equis I had. Maybe it's because I got to shoot things with a gun! Don't ask me what kind of gun. All I know is it went bang. I'm not very good at aiming, so that paper target man's crotch never stood a chance. I take that as a sign I could at least protect myself.

Day Nine: Pooch the Plumber

The first thing I noticed about this guy is that his wrench is almost comically huge compared to the rest of his body. My second thought: What exactly is he supposed to be fixing? I don't have any Lego sinks or Lego toilets. He's about as useless as Clyde (since there has yet to be a fire).

So basically my Lego town is now an episode of Two and a Half Men, except with slightly less cocaine and much less crazy religious fanaticism.

Let me just end by saying, you're definitely going to want to check by here again tomorrow. Not only will there be Legos, but Evernight is having another awesome blog hop you don't want to miss.

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 8

I can't decide if this thing is making the month move by faster or slower. Either way, my collection of Lego objects is growing by the day. I'm saving all the extra pieces and at the end of the month, I'm going to try to make some sort of creation out of them. We'll see if that works. So far it's all useless crap.

Day Eight: Super Skis and Super Ski Storage
By the design of the storage, you can tell it's fire fighting related. Because it's got red and bricks. Dead giveaway. I'm still trying to figure out the functionality of skis when it comes to fighting fires. I've got nothing. Either way, they're not awful.  Scruffy can't really use them because of his lack of ability to bend at the waist (he's very sensitive about that).

My socks were not blown off, but it's a decent item. Plus, gotta love having more storage. You can never have too much of that.

Tomorrow, I'm hoping for a Lego lady. Because these two need a touch of femininity in their lives. And I want to see what Lego boobs look like.

Friday, December 7, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 7

I was pretty optimistic about today. Either that, or after the crappy day I had, they could have given me a plain brick and it would have been the best damn brick ever.

Day Seven: Confusing Toy Firetruck
At first I thought it was an actual Lego people firetruck, but then what was that other thing? Derp. I realized it's a remote control. It's a toy firetruck. My Lego people, who are themselves toys, now have a toy to play with. Toy-ception.

Anyway so I put it together. I think it's cute. The remote even has a little handle, but neither of my Lego citizens can hold the remote and remain standing. Those crazy unbalanced bastards.

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 6

Day Six: Scruffy the Helmet Kid

Finally, Clyde is not alone. Today we meet Scruffy. He has a helmet. He also came with pieces that I assume are snowballs, but they don't fit in his hand so poor design choice there, Lego makers.
Scruffy is a Lego child, which means that while his arms are the same length as an adult Lego person, he has no joints for his legs to bend. It's a bit tragic. He'll never sit down. But at least his posture is good.
Clyde hasn't been around children before so he doesn't realize it was probably a bad idea to give Scruffy an ax, but it's necessary. Clyde must teach Scruffy how to fight fires and alien invaders and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 5

Today's item is probably the best thing ever in your life. I don't even want to open anymore doors nothing can live up to the magnificence that is today's item.

I'm just kidding.

Day Five: Fucking Storage
I guess it's alright. It came with an ax. Axes are cool.

I just can't get excited about this. Yeah, it's a convenient place to store all his fire fighting gear but does he really need it. Preparedness is key, but there aren't going to be any fires. After all, how would they get started to begin with?
Clyde is now contemplating his own mortality and the meaning of life. There seriously needs to be a Lego person behind the next door. Clyde needs to get laid.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Day 4

We left off with high hopes that today's door would contain Clyde's companion. Spoiler alert: It didn't. Life is so full of bitter disappointments, a lesson Clyde knows all too well because the cat knocked him over twice today.

Day Four: Useless Stairs and Fucking Awesome Magic Wand

I don't even get what the stairs are for. There are only three of them. Where are they supposed to lead?

The redeeming thing about today is the magic wand. It's beautiful. It's wonderful. It's all that is good in the world. Clyde is probably the biggest BAMF in the Lego universe. He's got a fucking wand. He's a wizard AND a Time Lord.
Now I know why we've yet to see another Lego person. They're intimidated by his awesome.

Monday, December 3, 2012

Lego Advent Calendar: Days 1-3

It's December! Christmas was always my favorite holiday, but this year, it's been hard to get into the spirit. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that it's still 80 degrees outside. Thank you, Texas.

I know you're supposed to start these things on the first day of December, but I was a bit late getting mine. It was a gift and I wasn't able to meet the gift giver until today.

Now, I've never done an advent calendar before, but the gist of it is that you open one little door a day until Christmas. but since I'm starting late, I got to open three at once.

Let me start by saying that the pieces are smaller than I expectedso my fat fingers struggled with it at first. The instructions are also really vague so at some point I just started making things up. I foresee this happening a lot.

Day One: Clyde the Firefighting Time Lord
I kind of expected a Lego person would be behind the first door because throughout the month, I'll be building a little Lego town. So I put Clyde together.
He has two of those little...black things. I assume those are what he uses to put out fires. Either that or some sort of alien weapon. Maybe Clyde is a Time Lord. In fact, yes. Clyde is a Time Lord. He also came with an extra hat.

Day Two: Assumed Chainsaw and Log
This confused the hell out of me at first, but eventually I figured out that it's supposed to be a chainsaw. Now, that didn't really help in putting it together. This was the first item I decided to just say fuck it and made something up.
Clyde is now armed with a poorly constructed chainsaw and an alien weapon. That poor log never stood a chance.

Day Three: Obligatory Christmas Tree
I was kind of hoping this door would have another little Lego person to be Clyde's companion. After all, every Time Lord needs one. Now that I'm all caught up, we'll have to wait until tomorrow and hope that the calender will give us a companion for Clyde. Until then, He's going to sit by his Christmas tree alone.
I put the extra hat on the tree. Hopefully Clyde can pretend it's another person for the time being.